Mo’s Moment

I have been asking God for a closer relationship with Him. I have been seeking greater knowledge of His word and His purpose in my life and I have been knocking on what feels like every door, looking for the rest of my life’s path because my desire is to be a willing and yielded vessel for God.

Have you ever offered to help someone and it was not until you were asked to help that you realized what you offered yourself for; then asked yourself “what did I get myself into?” Well that is kind of how I felt when God answered my prayers and began using me. First, I was confused. I wasn’t quite sure if I was hearing correctly or if what I was hearing was God. I questioned it for a while feeling unworthy and then I remembered that God is not looking for our ability but our availability. My doubt was turned into excitement. God wants to use me. Me! I sat in meditation realizing the magnitude of my prayer requests. In my praying, I began to ask God to search me and remove anything from me that is unpleasing in His sight (Psalms 139:23-24). I continually prayed that He create in me a clean heart and renew in me a righteous spirit (Psalms 51:1-15). I began to realize I did not love as I should, I was not being forgiving, and I was judgmental. All sorts of things about me began to surface within me and I was left to judge myself. I looked to God, laughed, and said this is one of those times when you ask yourself, “What did I get myself into?”

I asked of Him and He answered. I asked Him to search me and He found me. If I was to be a new creature in Christ I had to rid myself of those things that He searched me for. But I was having a hard time getting my same old wounded heart and stubborn mind to change and do things for my new spiritual being. It was not easy making my heart do something my mind said do; or making my mouth speak something my heart said say. So much of the old me was still present I didn’t know how to change her. I could not figure out how to bridge the gap between the new transformed mind and Mo’s old ways.

As I entered into a new realm of transformation, relocation, isolation, separation and elevation I could see that each level would present a more challenging task. This was discouraging at first because the spiritual warfare is heavier. I felt attacked on every angle: my finances, my business, my marriage, my joy. Life just seemed too heavy and I could not understand why. I know God will use anyone at any time but I questioned my readiness. Then I remembered, God never calls you to do something without giving you what you need to be successful in the call. Still I feared the call. I feared what might be a Job experience in my life. (2 Timothy 1:7) How much of a challenge was this realm going to be? I prayed every day that God increase my faith and increase my patience. I prayed to gain control of my thoughts. Deep inside I knew it was a battle in my mind and I needed to change my perspective because I found myself waking up every day worrying and stressed. (Matthew 6:25-34)

One morning after prayer I remembered watching my father as his portrayal of God in Evan Almighty says, “You pray for patience. Well, don’t I give you an opportunity to be patient?” That was it! God was in fact answering my prayers. He was increasing my patience by giving me something to be patient about. He was increasing my faith by sending me through the challenges. All of which was giving me a closer walk with Him because it caused me to seek Him daily. My perspective was changing but the battle was not completely over. I still was having trouble ridding myself of some things and my joy was not restored. That night I decided to fast in order to spiritually cleanse myself. (Mathew 6:16-18) I was holding on to things that I could not control and I needed to L. I. G. it (Let It Go). I chose to commit to the Master Cleanse for 10 days. Fasting is never easy but once you have made the decision to do it and committed to it, you are half way there. Remember – nothing happens until you decide.

This month I challenge you to do something good for your total being by cleansing your mind, body and spirit. I am asking you to join me in fasting and praying. Ask God to search you and find out His purpose for your life and use this opportunity to let go of some things. (Colossians 1:16) It is amazing what happens in life when you let go and Let God.

Love,
Mo